Failing to succeed

I failed at my 31 day project.

My 31 day project goal was to be more mindful and present for the month of October. For the first two weeks or so, I planned out and took a picture for my 365 project. I would then edit a few of those pictures for my blog. From there, I would think up and write content for my 31 day project blog entry, before I posted it all for the world to see (and by 'see' I mean worship and revere.).

Once all of these Promethian tasks were done it would be 11:30. My husband would be urging me to go to bed or to eat dinner, while I grunted responses to his questions.

And then the irony hit me. I couldn't actually be present if I was working so hard to document the process of being present; so, I abandoned my '31Day' project.

I failed and, by failing, I succeeded. It was completely eye opening to see how much time I was spending online.

I like to throw myself into things with obsessive zeal. Sometimes I focus on finishing a task at the expense of something else. I usually outsource the voice of reason to my husband. "You don't need to do as much", "sit and relax", "maybe you should stop and go to bed".

I want to do more, he wants me to be reasonable.

It was through the 31 day challenge that I was forced to see that I needed to develop these barriers for myself.

So, I have set up rules for my 365 project:
1. Take a picture each day
2. Adopt a theme for each week to help with inspiration
3. Consolidate the best pictures in a weekly post
4. Set blogging nights when husband out playing hockey
5. Edit and work in the office to avoid spending life on computer

All of this is to say that I will be blogging less, but let's be frank with each other for a moment.....this is really the best for both of us. I get to write less and spend more time with my dear, sweet husband and child.....and you don't get inundated with my rambling blog posts.

So....in honour of being present, my theme for this week is.....memories. I'll be posting a few pics this weekend. Enjoy!